Crappy Dracula Fantastic Dracula Found Footage Unearthed!
While digging through my grandpappy's basement earlier, I found an ole movie canister containing this strange promotion for an old timey vinyl record album. Who makes those anymore? "Greetings. In your world, I go by the handle, Dutta. I possess superior intellect to you earthlings, below average weightlifting skills, and the wind, he is my Brother. In exchange for fuel and directions back to my home planet, Nabisco-495, I have been invited to introduce you to EXCITING COMMERCIAL OFFER! So sit back, enjoy, and as they say in my Mother Tongue: 5555555. C------------rappy Dracula made a record and it's called "Fantastic Dracula"! It's a hip, now-sound with functions for days! It mixes, it twists, it'll mend your broken bones. There are chills, there are spills and in two graphic instances, there are dills. People magazine refused to return our calls. Gourmet magazine called it a big poopy pancake that's bad, bad, bad. Gibberish! I found mine in an Arby's! Do not attempt these songs at home, as they were attempted by real professionals. All of the lyrics are actually instructions! With so many entertainment choices these days, wouldn't you like something that looks like laundry, but feels like man's achievements in space? Don't run, squat thrust, to your nearest record store clerk, and demand "Fantastic Dracula!" It will stop blood from trying to leave your body! Nicey songs! Stay home! Pure bass! Don't ask! Some drums! Germaphobe! Comfort! Let's act! Songs like afldskj ... Turtle Beach Gaming Headsets Immediately Martin Guitar D35 Buy Online
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